FORGIVENESS CAN BE A REALLY DIFFICULT THING FOR MANY PEOPLE. BUT IT IS OFTEN THE MOST LIBERATING THING YOU CAN DO FOR YOURSELF.
I think one of the problems that many people have is that they believe that if they forgive someone who has not said sorry to them that they will be letting them off the hook and they think that as long as they don't forgive the other person that this will somehow result in the other person suffering.
We want to maintain this feeling of power and control over another person so we hold on tightly to the sense of betrayal, hurt and indignation that we are wallowing in. In reality often the person we are harbouring our grudge against or feeling betrayed by, has no awareness of this.
Often what helps is a change of focus from forgiveness of a person or people to instead creating a sense of forgiveness for the whole situation or event.A sense of forgiveness for the past along with a desire to leave it finished with in the past. This forgiveness can free the forgiver and allow them to move forward with their life-a healthy way to deal with difficult events and people.
Visualizations can be hugely helpful for creating a sense of true forgiveness and releasing of unwanted unhealthy feelings of anger and resentment.